I thought it was the effects of grief

Emergency surgery and three months of convalescence, I see now it has been so much more.

As I start to reemerge, many insights have visited. Many in the cold of the night, sleepless and shifting under the covers; others at dawn, revelations and realisations gently easing me into the new day. I feel there is much to do now that the emergency of ill health has ceased, and many thoughts to come as to what my practice will be in my returning.

During the last few years, many practitioners now walk different paths, some choosing to retire, others being forced to find other modes of income, many like me who see our ‘work’ as a vocation, there was never a doubt of not returning to clinic. So I know that I can rise again, like a Phoenix out of the ashes, renewed, refreshed with a sharp focus. And the question for me now is How?

One thing I know is that it will be a gentle return, to take the learnings and to go deeper into the unknown aspects of Why ill health manifests for us. There are many factors to be considered and sadly as our health system has other considerations, the psychological aspects of the physical manifestations aren’t readily addressed. I find myself in a period of rehabilitation, with support from associated charities instead.

Until ‘the way’ becomes clear, curating wellbeing events at Deershed in July and then End of the Road in early September will take my attention.

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